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Feeling Accomplished

4. Feeling Accomplished I feel really content today, and the day isn't even over. I know last night I was a pack of nerves and pre-prepared for a breakdown at the thought of my SO returning to work after the Christmas holidays, but today I've been on top of the world. On top of my world. I got up for baba at 5:15 this morning (usually I would leave that to the Mr as he would be getting up for work at 5:30am) took her downstairs, nappy change, bottle, breakfast, dressed and on the floor for some playtime - BAM. Then straight in the kitchen, empty bottles in sink, kettle on for coffee, took my tablets straight away - BOOM. My SO couldn't believe his eyes when he came in the living room. He couldn't stop smiling at me smiling. I was smiling! Haven't  done that much in a while... I got dressed and cleaned as soon as I could, got her off for her mid-morning nap - no problem. Met up with my mother, we went shopping, had a bit lunch. I even bought myself some clo
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Some Pre-bedtime Thoughts

3. Some Pre-bedtime Thoughts I know, I go to bed far too early. I'm slightly anaemic and I have a man-child and a child-child. I'm starting to get that sinking feeling I get when I know tomorrow I'll be on my own with the baby again. I dread it. I don't want to, I want to be better this year. I hate having nerves about not having help  when my back twinges or I get dizzy, sad or sleepy. I want to be able to put these feelings to the back of my mind (or even better, in the bin) so I can focus on baba. I hate being so dependant on my SO, I need to shake this feeling off. I've been feeling great today, I put some washing on, played with mini cheddar, got washed and dressed myself, tidied the living room, took the Christmas decorations down and even chilled out a bit while SO did some housework. We got a lot done. The Christmas/ New Year period throws all my normal duties out of whack - and they were already out of whack because of my depression and anxiety that h
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Happy 2018

2. Happy 2018 Happy New Year guys! I'm not really one for the "new year, new me" BS however I am making some changes to the way I usually am throughout the year. I'm in my early 20's, and a lot of my life has had to drastically change in order for me to be a good mum. I was some what a bit of a party animal before falling pregnant, I liked dolling myself up and going to town with the girls and drinking as much tequila slammers and vodka redbulls I could before stumbling (or face planting) in at 5am to sleep it off for a full day. I worked at night too, so I had most of the daytime free, to shop and live in Whetherspoons. It's safe to say, I was a little bit mental (well, lets face it, I still am, because when does a baby ever make you sane). So meeting my SO was one of the best things that ever happened to me. He's tamed me, grounded me, sobered me. Well, he got me pregnant, so that counts as sobering me right? And I was totally prepared for him t
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The first post. The boring post

1. I'm new to this... So this is my first ever blog. And I didn't think it was possible to be nervous about rambling about my life when there's a possible chance no one is ever going to read this. So, some stuff about me, I'm in my early twenties, mother to one adorable little demon and I'm tubby - none of this "oh but you're not fat" BS you can't even see me, I'm under 5' 4" and I'm a size 18, I'm tubby, but I rock it. You can't love boobs and a bum and not expect a tum. I love food, fashion, music and art - and I am crap at... all of them. I know, you're only six lines into my blog and I've insulted myself about 6 or 7 times, I really do see the light in all of it, and to be honest, I'm probably wrong about at least one of them (it's definitely not the cooking). I just prefer to see life as 'glass half empty'. My reason being, when something good happens (like the birth of my baby) it mak
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